I love being a boys' mom...

Because this afternoon, I was pelted in the back of the head while driving home from school with four stinky little socks. Just like their Southern Fried Mom, my boys love to get out of their shoes first thing.

Then, of course, they start with the foot-sniffing. They smell their own, they smell each-other's. If we were at home, they'd be smelling mine. (Please tell me that mine are not the only kids who do this!)

The President made the unlikely announcement that, "Fat Baby's feet smell like Cheez-Its!!!!"

Later, just after dinner, they began to antagonize and aggravate each other. Fat Baby began to whine/cry, and My Baby's Daddy gave him Man Advice. "You're as big as he is...go kick his butt!" (Thanks, MBD, for when I get the notes home from preschool that Fat Baby is threatening to kick people's butts!)

Fat Baby ran through the house like a tazmanian devil, chasing his evil big brother. Pop, unaware of all of this says, "Hey, Fat Baby...where are you going in such a hurry?"

His reply, "I've got to go kick that butt!!!"

What Not To Wear

The Big Week Of Fun is over. Spring Break festivities came to a screeching halt as both boys returned to school today. Woohoo. Too bad I spent the whole everloving day in a doctor's office with Pop. Seriously. The appointment should have taken an hour, hour and a half tops---FOUR AND A FREAKING HALF HOURS! I dropped Fat Baby at school, went straight there and returned home to drop off Pop twenty minutes before I was due back at the preschool. It's going to be all about me on Friday.

The wedding we attended was lovely. It was an outdoor event (very bold move this time of year, especially seeing how tornadoes ripped through the ATL just one week prior) and the weather was perfect. I was totally comfortable in a sleeveless dress with no hose. (I've been tanning for a month and a half).

I did mention that I found the perfect Southern Fried Family outfits for the day. What I don't remember telling you is that I purchased a "back-up" outfit, so I would have two to choose from. The main problem I had was that the dress I loved (and ultimately wore) was sleeveless. I wasn't sure I'd be able to find a little coordinating cardigan to wear if necessary. The back-up dress came with a matching cardigan, so I bought it to cover my bases, but later found one to go with Dress #1. I kept the back-up, because:
1)it's cute
2)it fits nicely
3)it was on sale
4)and I like to buy stuff

I didn't even take the back-up with me, because I loved Dress #1 so much. I was working Dress #1 which looked even better without the cardigan. (Hooray beautiful weather!) Just before the ceremony, as my perfectly coordinated prep-a-licious family looked on...in walked a cute and very SKINNY, younger girl in....THE BACK-UP!!!!!! I looked at My Baby's Daddy who was cracking up. I know he was thinking, "OH, Thank. You. Jesus!!!!" Because, as I told him, we would have looked like a freaking Nutri-System ad....and I would be the BEFORE picture!!!!!! Not good.

We were both very thankful for Dress #1, the un-needed cardigan, and my cute accessories at that moment. It would've been a long ride home for My Baby's Daddy if I'd been wearing the same dress as Kate Moss over there.

In other news....Fat Baby has peed in the potty almost every time I've taken him since last week!!!! HOORAY!!!!! Even with traveling, he is the bomb! It's like a light switch flipped, and now he goes potty. Next week---underwear city, baby!

And one more thing...did Atlanta officially vote itself out of the South? My Baby's Daddy grew up there & even he was amazed at the plethora of bad manners, rudeness, and don't even get me started on the road rage!!!

Easter Cookies

I mentioned in my last post that I was going to make Easter cookies with my boys this week. We did it last night, and it was fun and easy. They turned out great, and it was a new way to talk about the Easter story. Fat Baby was a little young to understand, but The President was old enough to read the passages aloud & understand the whole concept. My boys love to help in the kitchen.

Here's the recipe. It recommends doing this the night before Easter, but we're going to be out of town.

Easter Forgotten Cookies

These cookies are called "Forgotten Cookies" because you leave them in the oven overnight...forgotten. You can use chocolate chips in addition to nuts. The cookies are yummy.


You need:
1 cup whole pecans
1 tsp. vinegar
3 egg whites
pinch salt
1 cup sugar
zipper baggie
wooden spoon
tape
Bible
Preheat oven to 300

Place pecans in zipper baggie and let children beat them with the wooden spoon to break into small pieces. Explain that after Jesus was arrested He was beaten by the Roman soldiers. Read John 19:1-3.

Let each child smell the vinegar. Put 1 tsp. vinegar into mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross, He was given vinegar to drink. Read John 19:28-30.

Add egg whites to vinegar. Eggs represent life. Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read John 10:10-11.

Sprinkle a little salt into each child's hand. Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl. Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus' followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read Luke 23:27.

So far the ingredients are not very appetizing. Add 1 cup sugar. Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because He loves us. He wants us to know and belong to Him. Read Ps. 34:8 and John 3:16.

Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12 to 15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed. Explain that the color white represents the purity in God's eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus. Read Isa.1:18 and John 3:1-3.

Fold in broken nuts. Drop by teaspoons onto wax paper-covered cookie sheet. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus' body was laid. Read Matt. 27:57-60.

Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven OFF. Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door. Explain that Jesus' tomb was sealed. Read Matt. 27:65-66.

GO TO BED! Explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight. Jesus' followers were in despair when the tomb was sealed. Read John 16:20 and 22.

On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie. Notice the cracked surface and take a bite. The cookies are hollow! On the first Easter Jesus' followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read Matt. 28:1-9.


I did add the chocolate chips, and explained to the kids that Jesus always gives us more than we ask for, so we're going to add in something extra yummy & sweet.

Give me a break...really.

We're on Spring Break. Hooray! I do so enjoy a break...of course, if Christmas break is any indication it's not much of a break for me. I don't like to travel during Spring Break, because I don't want to waste a trip on iffy weather. I will however, plan non-stop days o' fun. Here's how our week is shaping up:

Friday a.m.: take everybody to school and frantically clean house and make sure all the linens are clean for sleepover guests (before I go to work)

2:40 p.m., Friday: Spring Break offically begins when school is out.

Around 3:45 p.m.: My mom, step-father, sister, nephew and niece arrive for a visit. Since I worked (outside the home!) on Friday, I opted for us to go out to dinner instead of cooking.

Saturday a.m.: make delicious and healthy fruit salad for breakfast, color 5 dozen hard-boiled eggs with kids for egg hunt later in the day, stuff plastic "prize eggs," organize treats and prizes

Noon-ish: prepare for a late lunch (hamburgers & hotdogs on the grill), hide and hunt eggs, and again...and again....lots of fun memories & photo ops, finally have lunch about 3:00

6:00 p.m.: family leaves...na na na na hey hey hey goodbye!

6:01 p.m. until bedtime: frantically try to restore some semblance of order to house

Monday: leave kids home (thanks, Pop!) so I can work a few hours. Pop gets combat pay for taking them to McD's on Spring Break.

This morning, 11:00 a.m.: leave the house for mandatory shopping, as we have Easter on Sunday and a wedding to attend Saturday...I put off the two hardest to fit (Fat Baby and moi) until the very. last. minute.

12:30 p.m.: My Baby's Daddy meets us for lunch, and takes a little extra time to entertain the troops while I try some things on.

1:45 p.m.: Time to say good-bye to daddy, and I've purchased an outfit & a back-up. Feeling pretty good.

About 2:15 p.m.: Cut the brothers some slack & take time-out for a carousel ride. (Thanks, Mommy!)

2:30 p.m.: Hit the children's section of my favorite department store for Fat Baby's spring wardrobe. Score some cute (on sale!) and fabulously preppy things that help me forget that I'm in mourning that The Era of The Jon-Jon is over. I loved the jon jon...dress it up, dress it down, wear it for play, for church, barefoot, with shoes, and with a monogram...forget it! It just doesn't get better than that! That boy could work a jon jon like nobody's business! Why don't they make jon jons in size 6 for a three-and-a-half year old?!?! Ummm, okay, never mind.

3:30 p.m.: Leaving the mall. Fat Baby's eyes are closed before we even leave the parking lot. Less than 5 minutes later, he begins to cry/moan with no tears and his eyes still closed. I thought he was uncomfortable & couldn't get to sleep.

3:40 p.m.: Fat Baby tosses his cookies. A lot.

3:42 p.m.: Pull into a Texaco station to attempt cleanup effort.

3:50 p.m.: Leave Texaco with pukey clothes tied up in shopping bag. Fat Baby asleep by 3:51.

6:00 p.m.: My family gets BLTs for dinner, with Oscar Meyer ready-to-cook bacon that I make My Baby's Daddy heat in the microwave. They better be glad they even got to eat.

Tomorrow's plan may include seeing the doctor, and definitely includes seeing a matinee of Horton Hears a Who! I'm not going to let a little throwing up stop me...oh, and three diarrhea diapers (about 5:15, 7:00, and 15 minutes ago).

Tomorrow night I plan to make Easter forgotten cookies. I'll post the recipe next time, because if you're even still reading this now you deserve a medal. Anyway, the cookies are cool and teach children the Easter story as they bake them.

Friday, we're taking a little side road trip to the Georgia Aquarium. Then a distant family wedding (also in GA) on Saturday. Come home late Saturday, Easter Bunny shows up, up Sunday for church...did I mention it's my week to teach Sunday school?!? and then Easter. Oh, and I guess we'll need a special family Easter lunch celebration...

When does school start back?

Tragedy

Finally, a long overdue maintenance day. I managed to weasel out of the house shortly after My Baby's Daddy headed out to Cracker Barrel with both boys (God bless him!) for their traditional Saturday morning Man Breakfast. Floating on the promise of a day of freedom, I headed to the gym. Because even though my nature is best suited to a day of luxury and pampering, my ass needs me to get on the treadmill twice a day until swimsuit season. And truly, once I get in the groove I do enjoy working out. I also enjoy buying smaller clothes. So there.

After the gym (and requisite bottled water consumption), my next stop was Sonic for a heavenly 44 ounce diet coke with fresh squeezed lime. It's a good day to be me.

Until.

I signed in at the pedicure place & started looking around for Misty. A cute and sweet little Asian Monet, Misty has been responsible for such masterpieces as the snowmen on my big toes for Christmas, and the blingy rhinestone daisies I sported at the beach last year. But honestly, I was kind of over the whole artistic factor & was going to have my French pedi converted into some good old traditional OPI in a fabulous shade of red. Sure, anyone can do a plain old pedicure, but I would totally ask that girl to marry me for her massage techniques.

Me: Is Misty not here today? (unheard of on Saturday a.m.)

Cute little Asian guy who always remembers my name: Misty is gone.

Me: Well, when will she be back?

Cute Asian guy: She's gone...she had to move to Atlanta with her husband's job.

Me: (On the floor, crying) Noooooooooo! She can't leave me!!!!

Cute Asian guy: We'll take care of you, I promise.

Me: Sniff.

Though the leg and foot massage wasn't Misty-caliber, I have to confess, my nails are indeed fabulous. I hope it stays warm so I can wear flip flops. I loooooove flip-flops. And being barefoot. And summer. I'm ready for spring.

After the pedicure, I hit the tanning bed which was also blissful. Came home, took a bath, and am already lounging in my pjs.

AND Fat Baby & I are flying solo tonight...so if I can sedate him, it will be blogs, books, and early bedtime!

I told y'all he was the president...

So, on Wednesday, The President has to do a report and presentation about a famous American. He chose the president (duh). He also has to come to school dressed as the aforementioned famous American. When I brought home his navy blazer and striped power tie, I thought he was going to hyperventilate. (It just occurred to me that I'm raising Alex P. Keaton). He has been campaigning (pun intended) for a "tuxedo" for two years. I could not make myself buy an honest-to-God suit (cheesy)for a seven year old, but he is going to rock the house with a blue oxford, khakis, and bucks (apparently they're making a comeback)along with the tie and blazer. I can totally coordinate the ensemble de frat boy. Looks just like his dad back in the day. It was so freaking cute, I could not look directly at him.

I told him that we should dress Fat Baby in black and sunglasses with a walkie-talkie to be the Secret Service. (Also a good idea for Halloween...)

Later, The Pres told me that he didn't understand...everyone knows about the Secret Service, why not just call it The Service?!? Smart ass.

In a non-presidential moment, we were having a conversation about the weather....(80 degrees today, 40 by the middle of the week) and the possibility of storms. I asked The President if he'd ever heard that March is "in like a lion, out like a lamb." He hadn't. I asked him to think about it & tell me what he thought that meant.

"Is it when you have a fart & then let it out softly?"

Hail to the Chief!