I am a day late with my Valentine's post. I would have preferred to just skip it altogether this year. It is not a good time. Things with my dad are still uncertain. I have neither the inclination nor the energy to go into details...but we still need many prayers. But that is not what this post is about.
This post is for my husband. He who got a bag of chocolates and an overwhelmed and distraught wife for Valentine's Day. He who took half the day off to just be close to me. He who knows when I need him to hold me close, and when to give me space.
I usually do something special for all my boys on holidays...I wasn't feeling it this year. You can fake it with the little guys most of the time. A box of candy makes them feel happy and loved.
My husband deserved so much more than chocolates, a special dinner, a really great gift, and/or sex. He didn't even get a card. I wish I had been able to sit down and express my love for him on paper. He deserves to know how I feel, but this year, the words wouldn't come.
First thing yesterday morning, he surprised me with an adorable gift set from Arbonne with a delicious bath and shower gel, lotion, and massage oil. And my favorite lipstick. There were also candy kisses and an over-sized button with a spinner that had different suggestions, i.e., hug, kiss for 30 seconds, sing a love song, nibble ear, etc. Too bad he didn't see any of that action.
He took care of the boys last night while I enjoyed a long, hot bath. Then, he tried to help me relax with a completely non-sexual massage.
That's what love is. Giving your whole self to the other person, expecting nothing in return. Knowing that whatever turn life takes, the two of you are committed to the vows you took. We have been married for 11 years. We dated for three before that. I love him more now that I did the day were were married. Our love has grown and changed, as have we. When I first knew I loved him, it was because he made me feel safe. I was so right about that. He protects me, and helps me keep my perspective. He makes me laugh. We communicate. We are best friends. I can tell him anything, and I tell him everything. I can tell him like it is, and he still loves me. Even if we disagree, we know that ours is a lasting love. I am thankful for him. I am glad that my sons are learning how to treat the women in their lives by his example. I don't say it or show it nearly enough, but he is my everything. He is what love means to me. I love you, MBD!